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Coach showed off his rack.

Screech banks three shots, which will be six carried over.

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Peewee’s funhouse was open for business. 

After huge first hand, Waxcuses was ready for bed.

“I guess any shorts you wear are Jim shorts.” – Junior. Everyone else, in unison: “SHOT.”

“Rock, paper, lizards.” –  Coach

Since the bracelet was on the line, there was much ado about dealer and blind position when starting heads-up play at the end of the second game. I couldn’t find official rules, so it may come down to a vote if no one finds a definitive resource. Everything I found agrees that the button has the small blind, but there is disagreement as to how the positions are assigned. 

The logic posed here is one option. 

In a poker tournament, when going down from three players to two players, the next big blind will be the first non-eliminated player clockwise from the big blind in the previous hand. The other player will be the small blind (and button).

Another option, as posted here:

When starting heads-up play, deal a single card face-up to each player. The player with the highest card gets the button first. This player posts the small blind, and the other player posts the big blind. 

Another option given here as found by Siri. 

No banked shots were noted.

Coach took home the bracelet after a tumultuous final hand — in its course, Peewee had bracelet hopes, lost them, gained them back, and ultimately was left with second place.

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The inaugural event in the 2015-2015 season started… well… kinda … slow. Even pocket rockets couldn’t take it home. After the longest slog in recent memory, Moe took home the bracelet and a bottle of Earth’s finest Chardonnay. 

“As many fingers as you want, Moe.” – Junior

*wet slurping sound* – Junior

“If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge aces.” – Coach

Screech becomes Peewee. 

“The optimizer is computing… Please input cards.” – Moe

As the dealer, “Come on, dealer!” – Waxcuses

“Diggers and hoes. HUGE ones!” – Siri

“🎤Peewee loves cock and balls… 🎶 put ‘Em in your mouth and dance with me 🎼” – Chorus

Bieber unleashes the four-card megaflop!

Congratulations to the GOPT 2014–2015 Champion!

At his own impromptu bachelor party, Screech took several shots and the bracelet – finishing first and fourth.

Many proposals were voted on.

“Gimme that dong!” Screech

“A chip and a broken chair!” Andre after Mrs. Clay Matthews leaned back in his chair, demolishing it.

“I’m all about that treble treble treble… No bass” Coach, about the failing audio.

Three new rules came up as a part of discussion.

• Rule changes are determined by majority vote of attendees at any official GOPT event.

• The host must provide a reasonable amount of peanut M&M’s and a reasonable ratio to other M&M’s flavors (if others are provided). Different M&M’s flavors must be served in separate bowls.

• At any point after you are out in the second tournament, you can take the cash you are owed. Other penalties may be incurred for doing so (e.g. for consulting the formula/matrix before event completion, for leaving before 11, or for deferring these shots). If you leave without taking your money, you are a fool; your winnings will be distributed as deemed appropriate by those present.

Results of votes on other proposals are shown below.

Proposal 1 (Rule reorganization)

Yay: All attendees.

Nay:

Result: Passed.

Proposal 2 (Most points –> GOPT bracelet at all Majors)

Yay: All attendees, but Andre had some hesitation.

Nay:

Result: Passed.

Proposal 3 (Host chooses the higher-weighted game)

Yay:

Nay: All attendees.

Result: Not passed.

Proposal 4 (Linearize Farmhouse payouts)

Proposal rejected — GOPT members are not in complete control of ESSOP payouts.

Proposal 5 (Instate Happy Days nicknames)

Yay: Siri, Moe.

Nay: Junior, Screech, The Bieb, Mrs. Clay Matthews, Andre

Coach obstains.

Result: Not passed.

Proposal 6 (Register dedicated GOPT domain)

Yay: All attendees.

Nay:

Result: Passed.

Junior, The Bieb, Siri, Andre voted to register gopt.poker – the other discussed option was greateroxfordpokertour.com. Moe obstains. gopt.poker will be registered.

Proposal 7 (Add a rule for dues: domain+bracelets)

Yay:

Nay: The Bieb and Screech vote no.

Result: Pass.

Proposal 8 (Start a 4th annual Major, “The Event”)

Yay:

Nay:

Result: No decision. Tabled for later discussion.

Moe proposes a fourth major.